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The Loneliness in Infertility

I wish someone could have prepared me for the roller coaster of emotions I would experience during infertility. Like many others, I wandered alone on this journey for far too long. I was too fearful to tell anyone what I was going through. I felt ashamed and embarrassed, and I didn’t want to believe that could be infertile.

For a while, I kept my fears hidden from my husband as well. I somehow believed that by keeping my worries to myself, I would make infertility disappear.

Eventually, I opened up to my husband about the emotional pain I was enduring every month. It was hard to admit to him that we were going through infertility let alone share our struggles with our friends and family. Opening up about infertility felt like another mountain to climb. Why was it that a couple with such a desire to become parents couldn’t?

Lonely No More

We finally reached a breaking point in 2019 when our journey to become parents escalated. I was emotionally heartbroken, and I couldn’t continue on the path I was going. I needed support, and we were finally ready to ask for help.

When we walked into the fertility clinic for the first time, I couldn’t believe my eyes. The room was packed. It was the moment I realized that even though we felt alone, we certainly were not. We didn’t have to be alone throughout this journey, and we were ready share with others.

Letting Go of Fear + Loneliness 

It is difficult to see past the fears, the unknown, the list of procedures, the treatment options, the medications, and the expenses. But by opening up to others, we no longer carried the burden of infertility alone. Sharing our struggle with others guided us to love, comfort, and healing.

Support

One of the first places I went for support was Facebook. There are hundreds of closed informational and support groups offering guidance in regards to infertility, Endometriosis, PCOS, IVF, adoption, finances, fertility, and so on. These groups have become my lifeline, and the people on the other end of these groups have provided me with invaluable support, encouragement, and information making this journey feel far less fearful and intimidating.

Since opening up about my struggle with infertility, I have restored my hope and optimism for the future of having a family, and I feel far more confident in our journey to get there.

A Little Reminder

Infertility can certainly be a lonely place, but it doesn’t have to be. There is a strong army of men and women ready to support you. So, when you feel ready, join a support group. If you’re not ready, that is okay, too! Remember, it took me nearly 2.5 years to feel ready to open up about our struggle to become parents.

So, wherever you are in your journey, know I’m here for you. Please count me as one of your personal friends. Let’s connect and move forward together.


About Tara

I’m a certified Integrative Nutrition Health Coach and soon-to-be holistic nutritionist living in Denver, CO. I love sharing nutrition information, infertility encouragement, as well as plant-based and gluten-free eats to support fertility and vitality. Follow my infertility journey, and join me as I navigate the world of fertility assistance, adoption, and natural fertility and healing.

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